January 25 2015

Heart attacks, cancer, car crashes, prison…negativity, jealousy, fear, depression, insomnia, cancer, heart attacks, tears, and forced laughs to try to ignore the reality that is what it is. Depression, suicide, the last thing you’ll ever know by me. Restricted, dead…maybe I should just end it all. Why so serious? Why not just laugh. Can anyone just save me? Can my music just sky rocket in popularity over night? Can’t the unexplained just happen? Just this once…I need it…I need out of this nightmare. This fear… No matter how much I cry, or try, I feel like…it should all just come to an end. Can I cry? Can’t someone tell me everything’s going to be okay? Instead I just have to cry to the silence because it’s taboo for men to cry…but I don’t care if I’m weak…or if my voice sucks…I’m singing…because that’s all I really care about. Live with it.

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